Roleplay Title: NFL - Not For Lesnar
NXW Roleplay #:
It's another sunny day out and the weather is seemingly getting hotter by the hour... The camera's turn on and we're viewing a football field. Although it's not a professional NFL or college football game going on, it appears these are just high school kids having fun. There's a crowd of many about 15 people sitting and watching the football game as well as talk to the person their sitting by. The camera's then zooms in to one side of the field where it looks like two people are setting up some sort of stand... And then as we get closer, we make sorta make those people out. The one person is a female, dressed nice but sexy with long blonde hair and long beautiful legs and the other in jean shorts and a black t-shirt with some kind of yin-yang logo on it... Finally, we can tell who they are by the letters that we can make out on his shirt... R ... V ... D. It's Rob Van Dam and his new manager, Stacy Keibler, and believe it or not she has a whistle around her neck. They're both taking something out of boxes and then finally we hear them speaking.
|2| Rob Van Dam |2| : " Come on, Stacy, faster! We need to get all this stuff out for the fans! Before half time starts! "
Stacy drops one of the boxes she had in her hands and moves a hand to her hip, looking angrily at Rob.
|2| Stacy Keibler |2| : " Listen Rob... I agreed to be your MANAGER .. Not slave! Not eye candy! And definitely not a person who carries these HEAVY boxes, especially in this heat. Rob, if I sweat anymore I'm going to drown. "
Stacy shakes her head and Rob looks on a little disappointed and sighs.
|2| Rob Van Dam |2| : " You're right... I guess I've been pushing you too much. I'm just a little excited about this new partnership we've got, Stace.. You know that. I'm also especially excited in my first ever NXW match. It's going to be so cool when I defeat Lesnar, you know how great it's going to feel giving him the Five Star Frogsplash in his first wrestling match ever since Wrestlemania 20? "
|2| Stacy Keibler |2| : " I know, Rob, I know. But this heat is too much... Didn't you pack lemonade or something? I'm dying of thirst. "
|2| Rob Van Dam |2| : " ... Yeah, but you know that's not for us, Stacy. And besides, where's the overly excited Stacy I was promised? "
|2| Stacy Keibler |2| : " You'll get her when I get some lemonade! "
|2| Rob Van Dam |2| : " Fine, but you're paying the 50 cents for it, nobody's getting any of RVD's special lemonade without paying first. "
|2| Stacy Keibler |2| : " Ugh, fine, Rob, whatever! Just give me some! "
Rob holds out his hand for the 50 cents and a small cup of lemonade in the other hand.
|2| Stacy Keibler |2| : " I can't believe you're making ME pay for this... "
|2| Rob Van Dam |2| : " You're not gonna be the only one, believe me... There's a lot of people on that football field that will be plenty thirsty. "
Stacy pays Rob and is handed the cup. She drinks as Rob begins unpacking some towels and putting them on the table.
|2| Rob Van Dam |2| : " There .. We're all done. The lemonade is set out, the jersey's are up and now our very special towels are all ready to be sold to these teenagers. Believe me, this is a good idea, Stace. "
|2| Stacy Keibler |2| : " Of course, Rob, you're filled with great ideas, dadday! "
Of course that was a sarcastic line by Ms. Keibler, although Rob didn't notice. A curious teenage male walks up to the table to see what's going on.
|2| Teenaged Male |2| : " What's going on here? Some kind of fundraiser? "
|2| Rob Van Dam |2| : " Exactly, dude... That's exactly what it is. "
|2| Teenaged Male |2| : " Oh.. uh.. To what fundraiser? "
|2| Rob Van Dam |2| : " Well, myself and this beautiful blonde to my right is supporting the Wrestling NFL fundraiser. "
|2| Teenaged Male |2| : " Wrestling and NFL are teaming up? "
|2| Rob Van Dam |2| : " Duuude.. Of course not! I mean come on.. Football and Wrestling? They just don't mix, EVERYBODY knows that .. But anyway, The Wrestling NFL is simple... It's the Wrestling Not For Lesnar fundraiser. It's to raise money for this mentally challenged dude named Brock Lesnar to seek help because every time he picks a profession, he chooses the wrong one. I mean first he tried out amateur wrestling, and get this... He sucked so bad he had to go pro! "
Stacy blinks and tries to correct Rob of his mistake...
|2| Stacy Keibler |2| : " Um, Rob.. Lesnar actually -- "
|2| Rob Van Dam |2| : " Dude, Stacy... Just make like a woman and shut up for once, okay? I'm trying to explain something to a customer.... Anyway, as I was saying dude... After he figured out pro wrestling wasn't for him, he tried going to the NFL. And guess what? That failed as well, so he cried his eyes out and came back to wrestling with his tail between his legs.. Oh, and a walrus as his manager. "
Rob grabs one of the towels as he's speaking.
|2| Rob Van Dam |2| : " So since I'm a totally nice person, before I beat the living hell out of this dude in my first match at NXW, I'm going to raise money to get him help after our match. Nice huh? Even better is that the way I'm getting money is because everything I'm selling is a Lesnar product. Such as these towels here, which Lesnar once used as a crying towel... I mean, not this one exactly, but one very similar to it. "
Rob opens up the towel and there's a huge picture of Brock Lesnar's face on it.
|2| Rob Van Dam |2| : " Look at how huge that guy's head is... Dude, that's not normal at all, right? It's oversized... So if Lesnar can fit all his tears into this here towel, obviously it'll handle drying you off or wiping the sweat off ya... So what do you say, would you like to purchase one? "
The kid seems skeptical at first but reaches into his pocket.
|2| Teenaged Male |2| : " Well, that IS an enormous head.. So I guess it has to do the job, right? How much? "
|2| Rob Van Dam |2| : " This here towel can be yours forever for just 2 dollars and 50 cents, dude. "
|2| Teenaged Male |2| : " Sounds like a good deal... I'll also take a lemonade, I'm thirsty as hell right now. So here's three bucks. "
He hands him the money and Rob gives him the towel and a cup of lemonade. He walks off and Stacy is completely speechless.
|2| Rob Van Dam |2| : " Look at that... We just got here and we're already 3 bucks in. See, I'm good at this stuff.. You should just let me handle it from here on in. "
|2| Stacy Keibler |2| : " You know, Rob... If I wasn't so impressed right now, I'd so slap you for that comment you made about women earlier. "
|2| Rob Van Dam |2| : " Yeah, yeah.. Just blow your whistle and get the attention of the other kids.. And remember, smile all the time.. Nobody likes party poopers, dude! "
Stacy blows on the whistle and RVD waits patiently. Suddenly a few kids walk up to the stand.
|2| Teenaged Male #2 |2| : " Hey, I heard there was lemonade was over here, how much? "
|2| Rob Van Dam |2| : " We have lots of lemonade here dudes and dudettes, and it's 50 cents a cup. "
|2| Teenaged Male #2 |2| : " Sounds like a good deal, we'll take some! "
|2| Rob Van Dam |2| : " Now that's awesome, dudes... But let's not forget, this is a fundraiser here. Just because you're thirsty and willing to pay me money doesn't keep Lesnar out of the wrestling ring. We need to fight this, we need to make enough money to send Brock Lesnar to a really good hospital where they'll convince him he's a no talent piece of garbage! We need to not only sell this lemonade, but the other products as well... Like over here, a specially made Walrus in a suit stuffed animal. And guess what his name is? It's Paulie... Hey dudes, buy a couple of these for the girlfriends and I'm sure it'll get you some seriously tongue action... "
Rob grabs a stuffed animal and lets one of the kids hold it.
|2| Rob Van Dam |2| : " It's really soft, just like person who inspired me to make it. Because he's really soft.. And let's also remember that his head is full of cotton, not brains - Exactly like Paul Heyman. But why talk about him, when you could be buying these for everyone you know? "
|2| Teenaged Male #2 |2| : " Uhh.. I'm not really a walrus fan, but perhaps my girlfriend will like it? I'll take one and we'll all take a cup of lemonade... "
Stacy helps Rob out by handing the kids their lemonade and taking the money from them. They walk off and Rob is all smiles.
|2| Rob Van Dam |2| : " This is working out perfectly. By far the most money Brock has made out on a football field, that's for sure! "
|2| Stacy Keibler |2| : " That's right, dadday! "
Stacy blows the whistle some more and another guy steps up and looks at the jersey's hanging up.
|2| Teenaged Male #3 |2| : " Cool looking Jersey's, whose is it? "
Stacy takes one of the Jersey's down and models it for the guy, as Rob talks.
|2| Rob Van Dam |2| : " This is the official jersey of the Wrestling NFL fundraiser. On the front it says Wrestling is Not For Lesnar and on the back, it says "Football isn't Either" .. And what's cool about this product is that it's signed by me, Rob Van Dam.. And it's on sale for 20 bucks. "
|2| Teenaged Male #3 |2| : " I'm not sure about that man... 20 bucks for some jersey of a guy I don't even know.. Nah, not really worth it. "
Rob thinks for a second and then grins, having an idea. He points to Stacy.
|2| Rob Van Dam |2| : " But if you act now, dude.. You'll get a kiss from Stacy! "
|2| Stacy Keibler |2| : " ... Hey! "
|2| Rob Van Dam |2| : " Dude, just chill... "
|2| Teenaged Male #3 |2| : " I'll take it! "
The kid is of course, excited over this and hands Rob his 20 bucks.
|2| Rob Van Dam |2| : " Okay Stacy, go ahead and pucker up... This kid has earned himself a kiss. "
Stacy glares at Rob, but goes ahead and kisses the boy on the cheek. He's happy still however and walks off with his jersey, unlike Stacy who is not thrilled at all and is glaring a hole through Rob.
|2| Rob Van Dam |2| : " Uhh.. Hey look at that... Almost thirty dollars! I think this is more than enough to get Brock the help he needs, so it looks like somebody has some packing to do... "
Stacy stands there, not moving an inch.
|2| Rob Van Dam |2| : " Fine, fine.. I'll help. I need the exercise anyway. The next time people will be seeing Rob Van Dam is at Zero Gravity, when I face and defeat Brock Lesnar just before I send him to the place he needs to go. Not that I need to get ready to face him or anything, but because when you're Rob Van Dam... You're always ready to send out a five star beating out on anyone. And you know why that is Stacy? "
|2| Stacy Keibler |2| : " There's so many reasons, Rob. We all know already you're unstoppable... You're the best wrestler in nXw .. You're One of a Kind .. And now that you're wrestling in nXw, you're Mr. Wednesday Night! "
|2| Rob Van Dam |2| : " That's right Stace, but it wasn't the reason I was thinking. The reason I'm so good, the reason I'm always ready, and the reason I can beat Brock Lesnar is simple... Stacy, I'm just the "
WHOLE ... FUCKIN' ... SHOW!
Stacy blows her whistle as Rob does his famous RVD taunt. They then begin to pack up and the scene fades off.
live to betray